Robyn: Hope in Medicine, Trust in the Lord
I was 50 years old when I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer (mbc). When I was first diagnosed, I did not have the normal reaction to the news. I decided to face this challenge as I had many other difficult challenges in the past-- head on. I refused to let my emotions dictate to me and I accepted the fact that there is no cure. My family, friends and adult sons took the news harder than I had. I have a wonderful oncologist, who also happened to be both my grandfather’s and father’s doctor in the past. I have had the loving support of my family and especially my mom Judy.
It took me 4 months to finally accept that I could not bully my way through this disease, and I broke down and cried.
My doctor made sure I had access to support groups and the right medicines. I have a very strong faith and am surrounded by people of like minds. My hope is in medicine, but my trust is in the Lord.
Each month I visit my doctor and go for blood work and an IV infusion to help protect my bones. The hardest thing for me was to accept that I needed to adjust my lifestyle according to how much pain I was having. I have done yoga for 10 years, but because of my shoulder and clavicle pain it is often not possible. I have found new ways to keep fit mentally and physically.
I live each day knowing that my time is limited, but for me that is a good thing. It causes me to be more mindful of what I can do for others. I want people to see my faith shine through.
I waited 6 years between mammograms because I thought (foolishly) that since I ate right and took very good care of myself I would be immune to cancer. I implore all women to get an exam every year and to never let someone override your own gut instinct. I have never blamed myself. I just believe that God is allowing this in my life for a reason. That is how I find peace. I have a 15 year old granddaughter and we have always been very close. I will be there with her for her first mammogram, if I am still here.
I will live each day as if it is a gift because it is, but shouldn't we live that way anyway?
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